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posted 1 hour ago via heartwolf · © chriscolfernews with 3,019 notes

Sometimes you have moments….

Sometimes you have moments where you lose your mind. This happened to me last night. I was on the way home from work, and I got really excited that I would be able to make it to Barnes and Noble before eleven, when the store closes. I stop in, take my time, shop around. I buy all the books that I plan on reading this year, enough to fill my two large bags full. There’s a pep in my step as I walk to the parking lot, I picture curling up with my book when I get home, lighting my candles, pouring some tea. I had no idea that dreamy moment would never happen. Not last at least. I get to my car, and I can’t find my keys. I kneel down and start to panic, frantically tearing through my purse. The only shiny metal objects I find are leftover coins from Paris. I decide to empty the contents of my purse onto the pavement, scouring every last inch. The contents are few, and the keys are nowhere to be found. I retrace my steps: I locked my car, put my keys in my purse, zipped my bag, walked to B&N, collected books, purchased books (which required opening my purse, taking out my wallet, returning the wallet and zipping up my purse), walked to my car, opened my purse, which led to this moment, keys gone, nowhere to be seen. Where did I lose my keys? This has never happened before! I have lost many things, my phone, earrings, house keys, etc. But never my car keys! B&N is now closed. My phone is dying and I call Chris. The doll that he is, he comes to my rescue. We call AAA, they patch me to a locksmith because my AAA is expired and needs to be renewed and being after hours, they can’t do it until morning. To my chagrin, I find out that only dealerships can duplicate a new key for my Mini Cooper, although there are many other brands of cars that locksmiths can make duplicates for on site. Just not mine. Disappointing news. The need to get into my house before morning is great, and I’m brainstorming ways to remedy these unlucky circumstances. I have already called my friend who has my spare, but she isn’t answering because she is on a date, which I found out later. Then, I realized that I might have a spare house key in the car. This night is turning into a comedy of errors. The locksmith comes, I show him which button opens the door. He shoves a metal rod into my poor little mini and fishes around for a very long time without success. I excuse myself and get into Chris’ car, because it is freezing. Out of nowhere, two women walk up with coffee in their hands, and ask the man if he needs help. He is clearly a locksmith, complete with tools and a truck, but in his reverent struggle, the two women think that they should join him. After a few minutes of Chris and I watching the women and the locksmith (very comical I must say as they bossed him around) the hilarious ladies flag down another mini driver en route to Duponts. The mini driver is Lillian (as we find out) and the two women think that she should insert her car keys into mine, in case it might open my car. I jump out of Chris’ car at this point, introduce myself to Lillian and the women, and try to stop the madness. They are adamant. Clearly it won’t work. Alas, Lillian, the locksmith and I oblige the two older women. Clearly, it didn’t work. The locksmith has called a friend to come help him out, and Chris has called BMW’s roadside assistance. Lillian has now recognized Chris and me, and is lovely, says she is a fan of the show, helps with the process of everything, even calls her AAA to try and help. It is really funny when you are going through a ridiculous experience like last night’s and someone recognizes you. You feel like a child. A silly little girl who has lost her keys. I felt like repeating this phrase over and over again, “Yes, I momentarily lost my mind and the keys. No, I don’t do this all the time I swear.” It is at this moment that all I want to do is punch in the window, grab my house keys and run away. Pretend none of this ever happened. Pretend I don’t even own a car. Take my bike everywhere. I don’t really need a car, do I? The locksmith’s friend has arrived. He is supposed to be the master, the professor of all locksmiths. He tells us all to back away. To his horror, he can’t open the car! He struggles for twenty minutes, just in time for the BMW roadside assistance guy to arrive, and tow my Mini to the dealership, so that my car would not be impounded in the Farmer’s Market parking lot (which the guards assured me it would be if I left it overnight). WHAT A NIGHT! Last but not least, Chris the saint (who gets five hundred brownie points and a nice sushi dinner) drives me to Millie’s house (she called back in the middle of it all) we retrieve my house key. Finally I am home about two and a half hours later. Note to self, losing your car key is not fun. Note to self, Chris is a saint. Life is full of peaches, limes, lemons and pears. Last night was a sour, sour lemon and was a night that I hope to never repeat. Although, Chris and I did get quite a few laughs out of the madness. As of today, I have a AAA card en route to my address. I still can’t believe the chain of events that occurred. Good night, good night. Guard your keys everyone!!!

posted 1 hour ago via felldowntherabbithole · © felldowntherabbithole with 1,642 notes

#bless ur heart

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